Month: February 2005

TiVo Takeover?

CNet News.com is reporting that Apple may try to take over TiVo. The article goes on to say that TiVo has a market capitalization of only $300million, meaning that I could practically take them over (I’m only about $299,995,000 short right now). Other suitors apparently include Time Warner.

I have to say that nothing would be better than TiVo getting bought out at this point in thier growth. They’ve managed to take the little company as far as possible on their own, and now they need the big time marketing and technology connections of one of the big boys. TiVo has managed to get the market share it currently has largely through word of mouth. I love my TiVo, it’s an awesome box, although their lack of suppport for Canada is vexing, there are ways around that. I moved to Windows Media Center edition recently not because of anything TiVo did itself, but MCE is easier for a Canucklehead to hook up.

Of course a TiVo costs about $150, while the license for MCE alone is about that, but TiVo has the whole “pay as you go” thing going for it, which racks up the total cost of ownership.

I’ve been really impressed with what you can do with Media Center, MP3’s on my stereo, weather plug-ins on my TV, recorded TV, and a fairly decent interface (although admittedly not as good as TiVo’s), all add up to a really good product. Of course it’s a Windows box, so it crashes occasionally…but what are you going to do?

Comics not for anyone anymore

Ryan (who’s site will be re-launched and updated soon…I promise) sent me this cool article from CBC on comics, Hey Kids! No Comics!, I’m currently reading a great book called “Men of Tomorrow” which talks about the birth of comics, and I can see very easily why comics are a dying breed. The guys who are in the industry are my age, while the founders of the industry were stunted kids, hell, one of the most prolific writers/editors in comics history, Jim Shooter, was 16 during his most acclaimed run on Legion of Super-Heroes.

Comics need to be like drugs. You’ve got your gateway drug marijuana (the Batman’s, Superman’s, Spider-Man’s, Bone), you’ve got your cheap, slightly harder gateway like acid (here’s where you get the kids hooked on something slightly more “mature”, more complicated plots like some of the Vertigo stuff, Powers, Dark Knight, Millar’s stuff), and then finally you’ve got the hardcore stuff like cocaine (Authority, 100 Bullets, Watchmen, Morrison’s stuff).

This is pretty much how I got into comics. When I was a kid I read Batman, it’s my first comic. Batman lead me into Teen Titans, Titans complex plots got me turned on to X-Men’s complex relationships. I still remember the day I discovered Alan Moore’s Swamp Thing, I bought it at Les’ Variety on Wortley Road in the Wortley Road Village in London. After buying it, I read it in the little cafe there over a grilled cheese sandwich. The story was about a kid who summoned a little white sock monkey looking ape thing with an Ouija board which killed his family. It scared the crap out of me, and to this day the smell of a greasy spoon reminds me of that comic (also, Sock Monkey’s creep me out because of it). After that I got into Animal Man, and started grooving on Sandman shortly after that. I kept growing with comics, and as I grew, the comics I was reading seemed to get more complex and advanced, but now it’s harder to find those gateway comics.

Where are the easily accessible Batman’s? Where’s the cheap Spider-Man comics? Make no mistake about it, if comics were $4.50 each when I got into them back then, I would never have gotten into them. They used to be cheap, disposable entertainment. They were printed on crappy paper, and usually had popcorn stories.

Hey, I like Watchmen as much as anybody, but not every goddamn comic has to be Watchmen! Make comics for kids again! This doesn’t mean that Y: The Last Man needs to go, it just means that a cheap Batman comic should be on the shelves this summer, an inexpensive Spidey should be there already (anybody remember when the Ultimates line was going to all be $1.25?). Why would retailers carry these books? Because rather than selling 24 copies of the $4.25 Spider-Man, they could sell 100 copies of the $1.25 Spider-Man comic…that’s more money in the long run, and 3x as many customers.

A message specifically for “Online Poker”

Dear “Online Poker”;

Thank you for visiting Chronicology.com. I really enjoy the e-mails you send me once a week, but you may as well stop. I have never once gone to any of your sites, and I’m not interested in any of the products that you email me. Further, by sending your HTML message through my contact form which is encoded to send all messages as plain text, I get to see the pure HTML delivered to me, not a fancy email.

There is no relationship between the two of us. I’m not a fan of online poker, I don’t even like gambling unless it’s done in the confines of Las Vegas Nevada (I’m not morally opposed to gambling, I just don’t find it fun unless I’m in Vegas…call me spoiled). I’m also a very discerning gambler. The only game I really like is Craps. Not a huge card fan (although I can have a good time with a few hands of blackjack), and not a fan of poker in particular (it seems too random to me). I’ve asked my wife, and apparently I don’t require any of the enhancement products you pimp either.

Please stop sending me emails, or I will have to hunt you down and hand deliver crispy M&M’s (the world’s worstest candy substance) directly to your door.

Thank you.

Blogs can get you fired

Attention internerds, be careful what you say on your weblog. Recent Google hire Mark Jen was recently fired for comments he made about Google on his weblog. A Delta Airlines employee was fired for posting a picture of herself in uniform (that one’s strange to me…why did Delta care?). Of course there’s Dooce, who’s so famous that the term “Dooced” was coined to refer to being fired due to one’s blog.

With a few exceptions, there are some pretty good reasons why these people were let go. The Google guy criticized a new employer…not too bright really. Dooce said some things about co-workers who had no sense of humour. The Delta lady…ummm, wore her uniform outside work hours?

I don’t think this Blog has ever been a problem for me. I don’t really speak about work on here that much, and the few times I have are to brag about something cool we’ve done which has been published as a press release. Pretty much if marketing and public relations haven’t released it, I don’t talk about it. Not here, not in private, not anywhere. That’s just common sense.

Of course there’s also my work blog, which is where I keep work related stuff, but unfortunately that’s just boring technical stuff which allows me to aggregate links and new knowledge in one place.

Boobs: Tools of the devil

I’ve thought that the United States was pretty much off its collective rocker for a few years now (about five to be precise, all of them under the benevolent reign of “W”), but now I’m just shocked and awed.

The United States of America, the country which invaded Iraq, has postured against Iran, has ongoing conflicts in a half dozen countries, and is seen by most of the world as the biggest bully on the block, has become totally ball-less. No scroat. Without testosterone. Completely lacking of any innate male-ness.

The testimony came last night during the SuperBowl, or more precisely, during the Super Bowl ads. Not only were ads pulled because they showed Mickey Rooney’s bare ass, or because they were tempting catholic priests, or because of various wardrobe malfucntions, but goDaddy’s previously approved ads were pulled by the NFL midway through the game.

The ad made a mockery of last year’s wardrobe malfunction, and featured a completely covered (although admittedly scantily clad) woman pleading her case in front of a cabinet of uppity suits for why she should be able to get out goDaddy’s message. It’s funny. It’s a little titalating.

Folks, here’s a little something for you to put in your pipes. The human body is a completely natural thing. It’s okay to enjoy looking at a form be it female or male (whatever floats your boat) that you find attractive.

It’s not okay to kill people. Ever.

That’s my message. Looking at things you find attractive has never in the history of humanity ended someone’s life. Killing pretty much always leads to the end of a life.

Maybe if the American people were as concerned about their country’s foreign policy as they are about Janet Jackson’s boob, the world wouldn’t be such an effed up place.

Who’s the big winner?

Another year, another Royal Rumble, and finally, FINALLY the rolls come my way, and I walk away with the winning team of Chris Benoit, Edge, Renee Dupree, Simon Dean, and the big man himself…Batista. Not only that, but for the second year in a row, the winner of the rumble eliminated the most superstars, making me the big winner from last night, and taking all of the cheese.

The coveted, and much sought after bacon prize was quite literally snapped from the victorious lap of Jeffro and placed in the hands of Benson, who proceeded to whoop and holler, proclaiming his love for the pig.

Jeff, who once again made a solid case for bacon-ness, was thwarted when Nunzio’s spot was stolen, much like Jeff’s bacon, by former WrestleMania Main Eventer, Royal Rumble winner, former King of the Ring, former Inter-Continental, WWE, and Undisputed champion Kurt Angle, who improved the overall suckitude of Jeff’s Jobbers to such unparalleled heights that we had no choice but to award the bacon prize to Benson.

The teams broke down as such:

Brian’s Best Effort

18 Simon Dean, 7 Edge, 28 Batista, 17 Renee Dupree, 29 Christian, 2 Chris Benoit

It was pretty cool seeing Benoit and Guerrero, the two guys who at last ‘Mania were champions, starting this match off.

Erzey’s Fearsome Five

1 Eddie Guerrero, 5 Hurricane, 27 Kane, 23 Viscera, 11 Jericho, 8 Rey Mysterio

Larry’s Legendary Legion

19 Shawn Michaels, 16 Charlie Haas, 14 Orlando Jordan, 25 John Cena, 30 Ric Flair, 9 Shelton Benjamin

Larry’s group had maybe the most gold of any team on Sunday night.

Jeff’s Jobbers

3 Daniel Puder, 21 Johnathon Coachman, 20 Curt Angle, 24 Paul London, 4 Hardcore Holly, 22 Mark Jindrak

The united jobbers of Benson

13 Muhammad Hussan, 15 Scotty 2 Hotty, 10 Booker T, 12 Luther Reigns, 6 Kenzo Suzuki, 26 Gene Snitsky

Interstingly Benson’s team may have had the shortest actual in-ring time. Hussan, in a show of outright racism by the gathered WWE stars, was eliminated within seconds of entering the ring. Hussan then eliminated Scotty 2 Hotty before he could even enter the ring. Snitsky was taken out shortly after entering, and Suzuki was sixth in and fourth out. As a matter of fact, every single one of Benson’s entrants were eliminated earlier than their number. Hussan in 13, out 5th, Scotty in 15th, out 6th, Booker in 10, out 9th, Luther in 12th, out 7th, Kenzo in 6th, out 4th, Snitsky in 26th, out 22nd.

Thoughts for next year;

A weighted bacon system, with each participant being worth a pre-determined amount of bacon from one through five strips. The winner with the most bacon would win the overall bacon. This of course means that the grand prize winner could indeed win all of the marbles.

With the last two years winners getting all the marbles, we should consider counting all of a team’s eliminations towards the eliminations pot.